If I were to have an open conversation with my devil (or one of them), I think this is what he would tell me. If he suffered occasional honesty attacks, I guess.
The job of destroying faith used to be much tougher, but it gets easier every year. Even with members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Luckily for me – humans don’t use their imagination as much as they used to. They world teaches them that only things that are visible actually exist. Everything else is a fairy tale. Yet, many still fall for the most ridiculous fairy tales ever told – that the human body with it’s incredible complexities is a product of chance, that the huge planet they live on will soon run out of space if they keep reproducing, that being single makes a person happier than having a family, that filing papers eight hours a day under a flickering, florescent lamp is more fulfilling than raising a child or that socialism will finally work – to name just a few examples. They replace true and proven many times values with their own, made up doctrine. But they feel good about it, because their faith is modern, accepted by those who dress in the robes of false priesthood – white coats, black gowns, etc. How delightful!
Humans don’t use their imagination as much as their ancestors did. More and more Latter-day Saints find some disturbing information related to their history and instead of considering the possibility that the story might not be true or related in a wrong way, they allow themselves to be bothered by it. They naively assume that since someone wrote it, it must be true. Can you imagine such lack of imagination? If you ask them: “How do you know this is true?”, they bare their solemn witness: “I have read it with my own eyes!” So amusing!
I’ve tried many different approaches in my recruiting efforts. Three of them work the best with the Saints:
1. Spreading made up rumors often suffices in weakening their faith. For example, I tell them that Joseph Smith believed there were people living on the moon.
2. If that doesn’t work I tell true stories but in my own way. My reports are incomplete. See, if you word a true and faith-promoting story correctly, omitting some facts and exaggerating other, you can do some serious mind confusing. For example, I remind the Saints that their ancestors practiced polygamy. Past practices work wonders, because it is impossible to fully understand them. All they know about polygamy is what they have seen on TV. They associate the practice with images of abused women and children, religious leaders who take advantage of their followers, etc. They have no idea that two different groups can practice plural marriage in different ways. One, for example, uses manipulation techniques and pressure while other respects personal agency and encourages seeking inspiration from the Almighty. As you might know – I am in the details. If my client doesn’t use his imagination, when he hears of polygamy, he assumes the worse – lustful motives.
3. But, of course, some don’t fall for it. They dig and dig until they learn some facts and keep their faith. So, I try the third method: I give them true facts but make them draw wrong conclusions. For example, I say: “Did you know that Brigham Young had some crazy ideas? Did you know that later prophets said those ideas were false doctrines?” Then, I hit them with this doubt-promoting thought: “Don’t be a full! Don’t be a member of a church whose presidents are human, fallible beings!”
My attacks at the Lord’s anointed don’t work with those clients who have, what you call “personal testimony”. Your Master calls it “revelation” or even more specifically – “personal revelation”. In the 16th chapter of Mathew’s account, a conversation between Him and Simon is recorded. He asked Simon who he thinks He is. After hearing Simon’s testimony – the Lord praises him for having learned an important truth not through one of his 5 senses, but through a personal revelation. He then said something some Latter-day Saints don’t understand – that the Church is built on the foundation of revelation.
My department has successfully infected the world with the idea that there is nothing outside the physical. This gives us an enormous advantage over humans, because we know some things which as long as they refuse to consider and investigate, will never know. I remember the events before the world was created. I have seen the First Vision. I have seen the events recorded in the Book of Mormon. I don’t need a special communication from God to know those things. But for those who decided to take the test of the second estate – revelation is the only way to know things their physical eyes haven’t seen, because they have passed through the veil of forgetfulness.
This is why our competitors walk all over the world in pairs and invite people to accept Moroni’s challenge – to study, ponder and ask God. Those who accept the challenge – receive a sure witness from God himself. Those are my toughest clients. Many of them get even more annoying, when they start serving in the Church which gives them many opportunities to strengthen their testimonies. If their attitudes are right, from time to time the veil gets really thin for them. They keep their covenants and enjoy the blessings predicated upon the laws they obey. They experience the Atonement, feel their guilt disappearing after a since prayer of repentance. Those kinds of humans are really hard to work with. They make me feel jealous. I want to hurt them, make them as miserable as I am, but they keep getting less and less receptive to my temptations so I don’t waste too much of my time on them (although occasionally I still keep trying to recruit them, because as long as they live, their probation is ongoing).
Personal testimony which comes from righteous living does ruin my plans of destroying faith in Jesus Christ and his priesthood. But that’s not all. There is also intelligence and logic. What really annoys me is the human ability to imagine or consider options. I guess, you call it “critical thinking”. Instead of taking my word that the Church must not be true because Joseph said this or Brigham did that, they start questioning me. If they ask these three questions, I just know I am about to lose a battle:
1. Is the story actually true?
2. Is the story complete?
3. Does it matter anyway?
If they do some research, they might come to the following conclusions:
1. Many anti-Mormon brochures claim that Joseph Smith said there are people living on the moon. But there is absolutely no evidence he has ever said it. The first time the story was published was decades after Smith’s death. It happened during the time the American public was obsessed with reports of canals and other man-made structures on Mars and Moon observed through telescopes. A member of the Church claimed he knew a guy who allegedly heard Joseph Smith describing the inhabitants of the Moon. No serious historian would take this story seriously, because there is absolutely no evidence the Prophet has ever said such things. So, the answer to the question: “Is the story actually true” is: “Most likely not.”
2. Joseph Smith had more than one wife. It is true. The immediate reaction is: he must have been an immoral man. But the more complete story is this: Joseph received the commandment to marry other women besides Emma by a revelation from God, just as many biblical prophets were commanded to take care of more than one wife. And when he was reluctant to obey, an angel with a flaming sword appeared to remind him that God won’t be mocked. By omitting those important details, the answer to the question: “Is the story complete?” is “No, it is not.”
3. Brigham Young’s Adam-God idea has never been approved by a unanimous consent of all living apostles and so it has never become an official doctrine of the Church. The Saints’ salvation depends on the purity of the Church’s teachings, not on Brother Brigham’s perfection during his mortality. So, yes, he said something that was far from being correct. But the question is: “Does it matter anyway?” And the answer is: “No, not at all.” Because God doesn’t expect his Saints to believe in a man – even as great as Brigham Young, but in the Lord – the only Man who has ever lived on the earth and never taught a false idea.
As you can see – my job is not easy, because some people use their agency to learn important truths through study and revelation. But I shouldn’t complain. As long as there are people who don’t ask good questions, my career is not over. Unemployment is not on the list of my concerns. At least for a while.
Yours truly,
devil
Humans don’t use their imagination as much as their ancestors did. More and more Latter-day Saints find some disturbing information related to their history and instead of considering the possibility that the story might not be true or related in a wrong way, they allow themselves to be bothered by it. They naively assume that since someone wrote it, it must be true. Can you imagine such lack of imagination? If you ask them: “How do you know this is true?”, they bare their solemn witness: “I have read it with my own eyes!” So amusing!
I’ve tried many different approaches in my recruiting efforts. Three of them work the best with the Saints:
1. Spreading made up rumors often suffices in weakening their faith. For example, I tell them that Joseph Smith believed there were people living on the moon.
2. If that doesn’t work I tell true stories but in my own way. My reports are incomplete. See, if you word a true and faith-promoting story correctly, omitting some facts and exaggerating other, you can do some serious mind confusing. For example, I remind the Saints that their ancestors practiced polygamy. Past practices work wonders, because it is impossible to fully understand them. All they know about polygamy is what they have seen on TV. They associate the practice with images of abused women and children, religious leaders who take advantage of their followers, etc. They have no idea that two different groups can practice plural marriage in different ways. One, for example, uses manipulation techniques and pressure while other respects personal agency and encourages seeking inspiration from the Almighty. As you might know – I am in the details. If my client doesn’t use his imagination, when he hears of polygamy, he assumes the worse – lustful motives.
3. But, of course, some don’t fall for it. They dig and dig until they learn some facts and keep their faith. So, I try the third method: I give them true facts but make them draw wrong conclusions. For example, I say: “Did you know that Brigham Young had some crazy ideas? Did you know that later prophets said those ideas were false doctrines?” Then, I hit them with this doubt-promoting thought: “Don’t be a full! Don’t be a member of a church whose presidents are human, fallible beings!”
My attacks at the Lord’s anointed don’t work with those clients who have, what you call “personal testimony”. Your Master calls it “revelation” or even more specifically – “personal revelation”. In the 16th chapter of Mathew’s account, a conversation between Him and Simon is recorded. He asked Simon who he thinks He is. After hearing Simon’s testimony – the Lord praises him for having learned an important truth not through one of his 5 senses, but through a personal revelation. He then said something some Latter-day Saints don’t understand – that the Church is built on the foundation of revelation.
My department has successfully infected the world with the idea that there is nothing outside the physical. This gives us an enormous advantage over humans, because we know some things which as long as they refuse to consider and investigate, will never know. I remember the events before the world was created. I have seen the First Vision. I have seen the events recorded in the Book of Mormon. I don’t need a special communication from God to know those things. But for those who decided to take the test of the second estate – revelation is the only way to know things their physical eyes haven’t seen, because they have passed through the veil of forgetfulness.
This is why our competitors walk all over the world in pairs and invite people to accept Moroni’s challenge – to study, ponder and ask God. Those who accept the challenge – receive a sure witness from God himself. Those are my toughest clients. Many of them get even more annoying, when they start serving in the Church which gives them many opportunities to strengthen their testimonies. If their attitudes are right, from time to time the veil gets really thin for them. They keep their covenants and enjoy the blessings predicated upon the laws they obey. They experience the Atonement, feel their guilt disappearing after a since prayer of repentance. Those kinds of humans are really hard to work with. They make me feel jealous. I want to hurt them, make them as miserable as I am, but they keep getting less and less receptive to my temptations so I don’t waste too much of my time on them (although occasionally I still keep trying to recruit them, because as long as they live, their probation is ongoing).
Personal testimony which comes from righteous living does ruin my plans of destroying faith in Jesus Christ and his priesthood. But that’s not all. There is also intelligence and logic. What really annoys me is the human ability to imagine or consider options. I guess, you call it “critical thinking”. Instead of taking my word that the Church must not be true because Joseph said this or Brigham did that, they start questioning me. If they ask these three questions, I just know I am about to lose a battle:
1. Is the story actually true?
2. Is the story complete?
3. Does it matter anyway?
If they do some research, they might come to the following conclusions:
1. Many anti-Mormon brochures claim that Joseph Smith said there are people living on the moon. But there is absolutely no evidence he has ever said it. The first time the story was published was decades after Smith’s death. It happened during the time the American public was obsessed with reports of canals and other man-made structures on Mars and Moon observed through telescopes. A member of the Church claimed he knew a guy who allegedly heard Joseph Smith describing the inhabitants of the Moon. No serious historian would take this story seriously, because there is absolutely no evidence the Prophet has ever said such things. So, the answer to the question: “Is the story actually true” is: “Most likely not.”
2. Joseph Smith had more than one wife. It is true. The immediate reaction is: he must have been an immoral man. But the more complete story is this: Joseph received the commandment to marry other women besides Emma by a revelation from God, just as many biblical prophets were commanded to take care of more than one wife. And when he was reluctant to obey, an angel with a flaming sword appeared to remind him that God won’t be mocked. By omitting those important details, the answer to the question: “Is the story complete?” is “No, it is not.”
3. Brigham Young’s Adam-God idea has never been approved by a unanimous consent of all living apostles and so it has never become an official doctrine of the Church. The Saints’ salvation depends on the purity of the Church’s teachings, not on Brother Brigham’s perfection during his mortality. So, yes, he said something that was far from being correct. But the question is: “Does it matter anyway?” And the answer is: “No, not at all.” Because God doesn’t expect his Saints to believe in a man – even as great as Brigham Young, but in the Lord – the only Man who has ever lived on the earth and never taught a false idea.
As you can see – my job is not easy, because some people use their agency to learn important truths through study and revelation. But I shouldn’t complain. As long as there are people who don’t ask good questions, my career is not over. Unemployment is not on the list of my concerns. At least for a while.
Yours truly,
devil
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